Forgiveness

Happy and healthy New Year to you lovelies!  It’s been a while and I truly hope that you are happy and well!  If you have a moment, I would really love to share something with you….it’s sort of my wish for you and a part of a much bigger project that I’ve been working on for 2018 and beyond…

Sometimes people say things that stick.  About a year ago, my dear friend Paula told me that “some years are for learning and some years are for teaching.”  I had no idea how much truth and comfort those words would eventually bring me, but I can tell you from personal experience, and even if you look back on your own life, I think you will agree; truer words have never been spoken.  As it turns out, I believe that 2017 was a major learning year for me; perhaps THE learning year above all others. The lessons I have learned and am continuing to unpack are not always framed in the happiest of contexts, but I’m starting to realize that after seemingly endless efforts, when the Universe wants to give you something, be it wisdom or opportunity or even an invitation to change, rest assured, it will do will do whatever it has to in order to get your attention

My big game-changer lesson this past year has been all about forgiveness….both given to others and to myself.

When I decided that I really needed to end this year by sharing with you what I have learned about forgiveness, I asked myself what the words that I associate with a lack of forgiveness would look like.  What would heavy-hearted words like “burden, grudge and anger” look like if they were suddenly to become tangible items that we could actually see?  The resulting image is part of a much bigger series of drawings that I have been working on, but we’ll start here for today… Today it’s all about luggage and the burden of carrying around so much anger, heartache and anything else that prevents our hearts from expanding and letting light in.  What you see in my drawing is what comes to mind for me from personal experience as a result of making the choice (And make no mistake, it is absolutely a choice) not to forgive somebody or ourselves for that matter.  We wind up dragging around and being tethered to oversized, heavy, beat-up old luggage being weighted down even more with the heaviest and most cumbersome ball and chain you ever did see!  There is no growth, no forward movement, just mud and weeds.  Can you imagine?  We literally CHOOSE to drag this old, outdated crap around with us instead of just setting it down.  But why?

I know a person who has actually made a habit out of being angry, scorned and choosing to withhold forgiveness.   She will spend the rest of her life choosing to be a victim who wears that rage almost like a tragic weapon she can conveniently pull out anytime things start getting a little too happy for the person who hurt her!  So many other beautiful emotions just waiting to be embraced and no matter what, this person always finds their way back to anger and carrying the burden of almost 25 years of pain.  To me, it would be like walking around with a piece of glass in your foot and choosing not to pull it out…. The sad truth is, eventually that glass splinters, other people blindly or even intentionally step on the pieces that broke off and before you know it, everybody closest to the person originally carrying the glass are walking around with shards of glass in their feet too….the anger almost becomes contagious and spreads out into the lives of anybody who crosses its path.

My experience is that it somehow feels safer to stay pissed and hurt because if we don’t, if we decide to begin the healing process or offer our forgiveness, than we are putting ourselves at risk that it may happen again or worse yet, we are going got have to take a look at ourselves during the healing process too…..and sometimes isn’t it true that the scariest place to look is really into our own truth-telling mirror.   

Healing and the raw truth that comes with it can leave us feeling open, exposed and vulnerable.  Since we have no crystal ball, unless we cut all ties with the person who hurt us (and YES, in some cases, this is absolutely necessary) we have zero guarantee that it won’t happen again.  But to be honest with you, this is not what forgiveness is about.

Forgiveness, genuine forgiveness doesn’t come with conditions or guarantees or even promises…but it does come with something even better. Forgiveness comes with freedom. Forgiveness comes with generosity and benevolence.  Forgiveness gives us the ability to move forward.  It leads by example and brings us into big beautiful healing light versus wallowing in heavy darkness.  Forgiveness brings us closer to our Divinity and our true nature.  

In our hearts, we must re-member that people do not hurt one another just for the heck of it.  It may sometimes appear that way, but peel back all the layers and you’re left with someone who themselves has been deeply hurt.  More often than not, that hurt never had a chance to heal and so it festers and winds up manifesting in ways that are not healthy, are often hurtful and will eventually become part of a pattern if we don’t interrupt the behavior at its source.

While it is not our responsibility or our job to go around attempting to fix everybody we perceive to be hurt or broken, we do have the opportunity to share with them an incredible act of selflessness that may in fact help to begin the healing process for us too.  We never truly know someone else’s story.  We never know what their life experience has truly been like, we only know what they have allowed us to see or the story we have created amidst our own perceptions and based on our own history.  But you know from your own life that everybody has a true back story and not all of them are fairy tales.  Perhaps amidst holding on so tightly to all our heartbreak and pain, we can realize that we have another option; we have the ability to forgive. 

The truth of the matter is that we will probably never forget whatever it was that lead us to this place of even needing to consider forgiveness. Going forward, we may not choose to have a relationship with the person who hurt us or we may choose to work alongside them and do what it takes to heal in the hope of building an even stronger relationship.  The context and outcome isn’t the most important part of the story…the gift is in the choice we make to offer our forgiveness. 

Think about it, pray about it, journal about it….do whatever you need to so that you will be comfortable with your decision and in the meantime, let me promise you this, and I speak from a place of true personal experience…  The right answer won’t be the easiest one.  For a while it may feel like you were the only one forced to give up something…or that the person you forgave got off too easy.  None of that is true, and none of it is relevant, those feelings are based in fear and come from ego.. What you are giving, this beautiful and such selfless act of forgiveness comes from a place of love….from your heart.  All that matters is that you made a tough but very healthy and potentially life changing decision for both of you to finally and permanently set an enormous burden down. By doing so, the Divine light that is always burning within you will most definitely grow exponentially brighter and may even help to light the way for someone else!  As the old saying goes; a candle to one, is often a candle to many.

As you go forward into a brand new year, I wish you love, I wish you good health, bliss and an abundance of blessings but mostly I wish you the ability to offer a true kindness in the form of unconditional forgiveness to the person or persons you know need it the most…. May you both know and share the blessing of a heart that is finally free of the burden of so much unnecessary weight!  

Happy New Year!

Love,

Heather

Soul Audit 2017

Hello there lovelies!! You probably noticed that I haven't been around much....turns out, I've sort of been on a self-prescribed hiatus the last several months trying to figure out what makes sense for me, for Ruby and for life in general. Sounds serious, right?

Well, I'll be honest with you because frankly, I don't believe in sugar coating or beating around the bush, so here it is....this past nine-ish months have been nothing short of a massive Shit Storm for me....and I mean that with a capital S!! Blech!

There were two major turning points in my life this year...one of them I knew was coming and the other completely blindsided me and left me feeling a lot like emotional road kill.  Nothing felt real and I woke up every day feeling as though my own once laser sharp instincts and judgment had abandoned me without warning.  I was doubting almost everything I had once taken for granted....

For a while it felt like every time I turned around I was getting sucker punched and for each step forward I took I was taking 5 more backwards... I'm not going to bore you with all the gruesome details, nor am I sharing this with you so you can feel sad for me....quite the contrary actually.  I'm sharing it because with all that pain has come what will probably be one of the greatest lessons of my life and if that lesson can help even ONE person to feel better about their own SHIT STORM, then that means we will be able to use it's power for good!

Admittedly, I had been quite lost the last several months and questioned pretty much every detail of my life....I'm an over-thinker by nature so for me this meant repeatedly turning over every rock and looking into every single nook and cranny of my life trying to figure out how it had all gone so terribly wrong.  I didn't realize it then, but I now understand it as sort of a "Soul Audit" (my new phrase for 2017).... a really DARK and painful audit, but an audit none-the-less.

The trouble was, the more I searched for answers, the more I kept coming up empty and was literally stuck.  I couldn't move forward, there were no clear paths to help me put this all back together again and I was feeling pretty f'ing broken.  But then, as can typically happen when you decide to ask for Divine help, I was given one of those clarifying life moments that slowly started to turn things around for me.

Having been left with what felt like nothing more than a million pieces of my own broken heart scattered all around me, my knee-jerk reaction was to act fast and without thinking try to scoop up all of those pieces and force them back together again before they were lost forever.  I spent months trying to do just that; I was desperately trying to put Humpty Dumpty back together ( I was Humpty in this story)....and it never worked.  Not once...not even close.  The harder I tried the more pieces kept disintegrating and it was almost too much to bear....

One day with all hope seemingly slipping through my fingers, I shared my painful frustration with someone I consider to be very wise and she looked at me and said, "Heather, what you're doing is emotional suicide...the pieces will never fit the way they used to because there are too many tiny little shards missing that you can't even see.  There are slivers and even chunks that are broken beyond repair or shattered to smithereens... your heart and your life will never look or feel the way it used to because it can't; it's physically and emotionally impossible." 

WOW...in an instant, the light bulb was ON; it was blindingly bright and just when I thought my head was going to explode, she went on to say, "Instead of trying to grab every single piece, why not take a step back, take a good look at what is scattered around you and just pick up ONE piece.  Pick up the one that calls out the loudest, the one that is still relevant and makes sense to hold on to.  Take that piece and use it as the NEW foundation to slowly start adding additional pieces...and then if another piece still seems to fit, pick up that one...one at a time slowly and intentionally until you have all the pieces you still want.  The rest you can just let go of...you can't use them and you don't need them anymore....they are no longer part of your story.  Wherever there are holes now means you get to create and mold new pieces...you choose what they look like...you decide what fits." 

Oh my gosh....this is the stuff that has the power to change everything right? Of course it does....but not immediately...nope, not even close....until recently.  I've been playing those words over and over in my head for the last several months because they made such profound and beautiful sense but I couldn't make them work for me.  I was not ready to let go of what didn't fit.  I was not ready to trust myself enough to know that I had everything I needed to create whatever I wanted to use in order to fill in those holes.  All that old stuff I was carrying along with me, the shards and slivers; they were too familiar...they were comfortable and so even though I kept cutting myself on all the sharp, chipped edges, I kept trying to make them fit anyway.  I was terrified that if I left them behind I would wind up with a cold, beat-up, swiss cheese looking, broken heart...

Turns out, I was wrong.

One day after months of being absolutely terrified that my creativity was gone forever, I suddenly felt like creating again...I designed a pattern for myself and made some simple fabric flowers...and I didn't stop, I just kept making those damned fabulous flowers and I LOVE it. Without any warning or even effort, I felt a tiny spark ignite somewhere deep inside of me that I believed was snuffed out forever.  I also started journaling about possibility again.   I allowed myself to write about positive things other than what I thought was broken...and I felt the spark getting a little brighter...  I began giving myself permission to jump in and devour things I had always wanted to study like Kabbalah, the Hebrew alphabet and even dusted off my 40 year relationship with Tarot Cards.... I started doing things for no reason other than they made me feel happy. 

Then one day I took a step towards offering forgiveness....I didn't fully embrace it, but I moved a little closer to it and I actually felt a little lighter.  Every day since then is like a dance; two steps towards forgiveness, one step back...cha cha cha...no rushing, no pressure, just intentional movement in the direction that sustains that lighter feeling for me...

I didn't realize it until just recently, but all of those things and even those tiny steps are the new pieces just for me and they are literally bringing me back to life....one little piece at a time is slowly filling in the holes.  

I used to think that once something was broken it would never be as good as it once had been.  Now, and for the first time in my life, I truly understand that with a lot of patience, some serious soul-searching and learning to nurture and heal ourselves, there is real hope.  If we are willing to do the work, we might just put ourselves back together better, stronger and more beautiful than we ever dreamed possible. 

My heart has a long way to go, but each day I work my ass off to be intentional about how and what I create to fill in the holes.  These days, instead of something I believed was forever broken, I'm starting to see my heart as a never-ending, always evolving art project that's growth and repair is only as limited as my own imagination and potential.

My hope, my prayer is that if your heart has suffered a bad break you will remember that with time and intention, you are the only one with the ability to put it back together again. You can't expect it to look the way it used to because all of those old pieces just don't serve you anymore but when you are ready, your new pieces will be fabulous and wonderful and full of amazing and happy possibility!  This I know for sure!

Thank you so much for taking the time to walk with me for a moment!

 

I wish you unlimited bliss and blessings!

Heather

 

Teshuvah for EVERYBODY!!!

     So you've been hearing about this whole Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur thing forever but think there is no place for you at the table because you’re not a Jew, right?  Wrong!  Sorry to my Jewish people who wanted to keep all this goodness just for us, but  to my way of thinking, there is already enough separateness in the world without the lines in the sand that religion has helped us to draw.  I really believe many parts of the beauty and symbolism within ALL religions exist to be shared and made accessible by ALL and for all, so that’s exactly what I’m going to do!  Today I’m offering up the keys to the High Holy Days Teshuvah Castle and YOU are cordially invited!

     So, yes, here we are wading towards the deep end of High Holy Day heaven (the time of year when Jews celebrate the New Year,  Day of Atonement, and Sukkot) and that can only mean one thing; it’s Teshuvah season baby!!  What?  Teshuvah….TE-SHU-VAH….(yay, you just learned what I know is going to become your favorite Hebrew word) 

     You've already missed out on the last 30 days, but the next 10 days leading up to Yom Kippur are your chance to get in on Teshuvah which quite literally means ‘to return’ or ‘turning.’  In the simplest terms, it’s about apologies, atonement and turning back towards a Divine state of being closer to our Creator.   It’s when you and I (Jew and non-Jew alike) acknowledge that we regret a decision or action(s) we’ve made, we regret having used lousy judgment, hurt someone’s feelings, a mess we’ve created or even a bad attitude towards someone or something and we take the necessary steps to make amends, atone, or in the simplest terms, own our shit, apologize and make it right.

     Since I tend to be sort of a visual girl, think of it like this; Teshuvah is that beautiful and Divine place within each and every one of us that remains completely untouched by the real world; it’s the place where our soul resides in its most pure and original state.  Picture Teshuvah as an essence within each and every one of us where all the ugly stuff gets to be bathed in divine light and made whole and clean again.  You can access it anytime you want, but the key is that you have to WANT to.  

     This time of year during the High Holy Days, we take a good long look in the mirror, atone for our sins and ask that we be written in the Book of Life for a good and sweet coming year.  Teshuvah is the “reset” button that helps us get there; not by erasing everything we have done and pretending it didn’t happen, but instead by asking us to take a good long look at it, apologize for it and decide to make it right and do better as we go forward.  There isn’t a soul alive who isn’t entitled to and invited to step back and do a little “soul accounting” during the High Holy Days and EVERY day for that matter.

So, if you’re looking to get in on the whole Teshuvah craze happening right now (for the next ten days), here are a few things you can do in order to make that happen!  

1-      SPEAK IT OUT LOUD  Whatever you did…..say it out loud.  Somehow hearing our own voice makes it more real and far more powerful.  So say it out loud my friend, give it wings and prepare to set it free.….the Divine energy who breathed you into existence is always listening.

2-      FIX IT/APOLOGIZE  Begin from a place of love and say you’re sorry to the person or persons you wronged.  Why should the Divine be the only one to forgive you?  Why not spread it around a bit and apologize to the actual person you hurt so they can forgive you too!  Say it like you mean it and keep saying it until they hear you! 

3-      FORGIVE YOURSELF  It doesn’t really do any good if your Creator and all the people you’ve  wronged have forgiven you if you’re not going to forgive yourself.  You’re human and you fumbled; probably more than once if we’re being honest, right?  You owned it, you apologized for it (multiple times if need be) and now it’s time to forgive yourself and move forward.

4-      DO BETTER.  That’s right….DO BETTER.  Period.  Simpler words have never been spoken.  This is your chance for a blank slate, a do-over, a Mulligan (for all my friends who enjoy golf) and yes, a divine "Reset."  So, as you go forward with your beautiful life, begin everything from a place of love, think before you act, make good choices and be intentional about putting good  out into the world via your renewed fabulous attitude, your positive actions and your whole-hearted intentions.  Do better this year and next year when we get together to do this again, your list will be much shorter and we can all get to dinner much faster!

Until then, I wish you, all of you, La Shana Tova (a good Year) and blessings of love, light and an abundance of all good things!!

Thank you for being here and if you like what you read, will you please CLICK the LIKE button and tell a friend….it lets me know you’re out there

Wishing you bliss, love and magic,

Heather

New Moon On Monday....AND a Solar Eclipse!

A new moon and a solar eclipse today?  Can we talk about how incredible this is?  Can we talk about the potential and possibility this brings?  Can we talk about how excited I am?  Holy shitake!!!  What a magical day!!!

Okay….let’s start with the Solar Eclipse…
I won’t bore you with the science that goes along with this cosmic rarity because I know you can read that information all over the place.  So, instead let’s just chat a bit about what this eclipse has to offer and I'll assume that you are willing to step right up and delight in the litany of gifts it can bring.
Simply put, I like to think of a solar eclipse as a harbinger of change and deliverer of truth.  Pretty fancy and monumental stuff, right?  Well, anything less simply wouldn’t be giving this fantastic event (coupled with a new moon) its proper credit. 

Ever play with one of those wind-up Jack in the Box toys?  You wind and wind and wind never knowing when that sucker is going to pop right open and set that bobble headed clown free.  Well, a solar eclipse is sort of like that.  Today is that day, except instead of the creepy clown, the box is going to pop open and reveal all sorts of feelings, fears and emotions you have kept hidden; maybe even from yourself.    
Eclipses bring clarity (if we let them) and have a beautiful and very necessary way of ripping the bandage off things you might not have wanted to deal with just yet.  Today you may find yourself annoyed, anxious, sad or even surprised by things that you didn’t realize were weighing on you.  Don’t ignore them or pretend they aren’t there, they exist so that you can learn from them.  Every feeling, good or bad, has a message for you.  It might be time to ask yourself what truths you have been hiding from that you can now acknowledge and set free today?
Teachers in one form or another have always shown up and tried to get your attention in order to show you certain insights.  Sometimes it is merely to show you who you do not want to be.  Other times they lead you into situations that essentially force you to see things you haven’t wanted to acknowledge.  They have also served as wonderful guides leading you to embrace and celebrate change versus running away from it.
Today as the moon completely blocks out the sun for a moment, we can close our eyes and turn away as a means of ‘protection,’ or, as we avert our eyes, instead of closing them, we can pause to let our gaze linger elsewhere and intentionally become aware of what is actually happening around and within us.  Maybe both figuratively and literally, we will SEE or FEEL things we may never have noticed before.  Perhaps they have been there all along and we just weren’t willing to notice?  Ready or not, here they come!

Eclipses are also a wonderful time to set goals, and perhaps even make a leap towards honoring whatever your dreams and visions are for yourself.  If they’ve been hanging around just under the surface, today there will be no ignoring them and honestly, I bet that if you open your mind, you’ll find that to be a really good thing!!  
That being said, if one momentous eclipse has the power to bring all of this magic with it, can you imagine what we are capable of if it happens to fall on the day of a full moon too?  OH.  MY. STARS!
Duran Duran didn’t write a whole song about a New Moon on Monday just because its pretty!  No way sister!  There is wondrous work and adventure to begin today!

New Moons are actually my favorite, most magical, full of possibility lunar experiences!  They are seeds waiting to be planted, and blank pages perfect for you and I to come and fill up with our most desired wishes, hopes and dream.  They are beginnings and intentions and all of those day-dreamy plans you’ve been dying to make but instead you let fear get in the way….  Today is the day to say, “screw you fear and practicality!!  Instead, I’m going with authenticity and possibility!”

New moons are a time to think, they invite us to take pause, set our limitations free and really commit to anything we would truly like to see come to fruition in our lives!  Today, the soil of your imagination and possibility is perfectly tilled and ready for you to begin planting! 

What would you like to plant today?  What sort of seeds will you be offering today?  What would it look and feel like if you really decided to follow your bliss and align your intentions from a place of absolute truth and fearless possibility?  What if you didn’t let your history dictate or get in the way of your future?  What if you didn’t permit other people’s expectations to inform what makes you truly happy?  What if you finally embraced the knowing that all of your excuses are just the voice of fear and resistance in disguise as a way to keep you from feeling true joy?

How many people have you known that literally spent their whole lives waiting for the perfect moment before they decided to leap?  Well, here’s a hot little news flash for you….every breath, every moment, every additional hour is the PERFECT MOMENT passing you by. 

Today is the perfect day.  Today you have at your disposal a beautiful new moon ripe with possibility and charged with all of the energy and wonder that the solar eclipse brings! It is a one-of-a-kind, fantastic day to believe in the power of your own unique and brilliant divine magic! I hope that you will really take the time to plant your seeds and get ready to cultivate and create your very own garden!

That being said, I would love for you to join me in a little  New Moon Manifestation Ritual I have created!  I think I told you before, I’m a visual girl, so while it is also perfectly fine if you choose to just write down in a journal what you would like to create or manifest in your lives, I need bells, whistles and a little bit of fire! 

Please, you do what is comfortable for you!!! 

New Moon Manifestation Ritual

For this you’ll just need a few things

• A Bowl of Water perhaps scented with your favorite oils and/or flower petal
• Towel for drying
• A candle and matches
• Pen and paper

Once you have gathered your supplies, create a quiet space for yourself.  It could be a table top, a special corner of a room or even outdoors.  You can make it special by gathering up a few symbolic or personal items like the ones I have in the photo above, or leave it plain and just be with your candle!  It can be a permanent space or one that you just use for the evening….whatever works for you!  Please just be certain not to light your candle near anything flammable.
Once you’re all set up, take a moment and dip your hands into the bowl of water, rub them gently together as if you were washing them.  As you are doing this, see all of your fear, all of your apprehensions, excuses, all of the shadows that kept saying no…..see all of your self-imposed and perceived limitations being washed away.  Acknowledge that your heart is open and you are ready to step into a place of pure and truely divine possibility.  
Dry your hands, close your eyes and take a few deep, calming breaths.  When you are ready, go ahead and light your candle.

Once your candle is lit it is time to take a few moments, sit quietly and write out what you would like to manifest in your life.  Would you like to invite forgiveness, courage or some sort of new feeling into your heart?  Would you like to make a request?  Do you have dreams and wishes you would like to manifest?  Is there something new you would like to cultivate in your life?  Do you want a new job?  Be as specific as possible.  Be very clear about what your intentions are.  Write as many or as few things as you like.
Once you are finished, sign and date your list.  A few more steady and very intentional deep breaths and then, with confidence and conviction, slowly read your list out loud.  As you speak, see the words of your wishes, your hopes and your intentions drifting slowly off into the abyss so that the Universe can collect them and help you to set their creation in motion.  Visualize every word, every wish as it disappears into the sky.  If you would like, go ahead and read your list out loud a few times until you are focused on seeing your intentions drift off into the night.

Once you have read your list, take a moment to express your gratitude to our Creator/Source/G-d/Divine (whatever you call that which IS) for the many blessings already in your life and for those yet to come.  Say a prayer of thanks for these "seeds" that you have just planted.  Feel deep in your heart the truth that your intention and belief in their possibility has already set divine wheels in motion.  Take a moment to be still and hear nothing but the sound of your own breathing.  As you exhale and blow your candle out watch as the smoke carries your intentions and gratitude out into the world so that it may, like a wave or ripple effect, deliver ongoing blessings and abundance to any who cross your path! 
Fold up your list, tuck it safely under your candle, in a special wish box or even a drawer as long as you know where it is.  Over the next few weeks as your wishes, dreams and intentions begin to manifest in your life, refer back to your list, read the remaining intentions out loud again and each time you put it away offer a prayer of gratitude and blessings out into the world!

Thank you so much for joining me on this most magical and wondrous of days!  Above all else, I hope that you will remember....while special days like today do bring a certain sort of  uniquely incredible, powerful and blessed energy and potential with them, you have access to this sort of divine possibility available to you at any given moment.  You are created in love....of and from a divine light that never stops burning within you.  Everything you have ever or will ever need to create the life you have been searching for, the life you have been waiting for, has been within you since the moment you were prayed into existence!  Your divine magic and all of the gifts that come with it have been with you since long before you even took your very first breath!  Please hold that knowledge as your truth each and every day!
I wish you an abundance of bliss and blessings!
Heather

Expectation Killed Happiness

“Hey Heather…..Expectation is the Mother of all Happiness Killers…."
That’s the first thing I heard when I woke up this morning.  Some sort of bizarre voice in my head tapping on the inside of my brain to let me know that, just in case I hadn’t already figured it out; “expectation is the ultimate happiness killer.”  I don’t know where the voice actually came from or who it was doing the talking (could have been the reasonable, rational ME who knows way too much about life and likes to show off every once in a while by actually making SENSE) but it’s one of those things I heard SO clearly and intentionally that now I can’t STOP hearing it and I feel like I need to share!

How many versions of unhappiness in our lives can actually be attributed to disappointment?  And yet, disappointment with ourselves or others is ultimately just the unwrapped, stripped down result of expectation that has not been met or satisfied, right?  BAM! 
Expectation Kills Happiness!!
I think my brain is on to something here!

-The promotion you didn’t get.
-The human being that really let you down, didn’t say the right thing, didn’t have your back etc
-The friend who wasn’t there when you really needed them to be.
-The guy who cut in front of you at the coffee shop.
-The weather report that was dead wrong (I know that’s a really tough one to believe)
-The 25 pounds that didn’t magically disappear from the reading on the scale
-The house you didn’t sell.
-The credit you never got.
-The art project that wound up not turning out like you thought it would.
-The date that just plain sucked.
-The trip that got cancelled.
-The event that flopped.
-The compliment nobody bothered to give you.
-The spouse or significant other that let you down.
-The person you looked up to falling from grace.

Oh my gosh...The list goes on and on; all sorts of things and desired outcomes we hoped would happen that simply didn’t…or they fell short, or they just absolutely tanked… 
Expectation Expectation Expectation (peppered with a little bit of perception but we’ll talk about that another day)
We expected and hoped for one thing, and what we wound up with was completely different or maybe the total opposite.  
We are left feeling disappointed, unhappy, pissed off, resentful, scorned, sad….  None of these adjectives are things we strive for, but let’s face it, when things don’t go our way, when our expectations haven’t been met, we are not happy campers.

So as I was laying in bed this morning and thinking about this delightful “wake-up statement” that greeted me today, my mind started wandering.   I started to recognize just how many times throughout the course of one tiny day I equate or rank my own happiness based on some sort of an expected external outcome.  Then my mind wandered further up the road and I realized that this mentality means that I am literally gift wrapping and handing over control of my own happiness to an expected result that I have little or no control over.  I'm setting myself up to be miserable dammit!

It dawns on me that happiness being contingent on results is sort of like playing some type of bullshit Bliss roulette….  Rather than deciding to be happy FIRST, I was hinging everything on results…an emotional crap shoot; a spin of the proverbial happiness wheel.  Put everything on RED (expectation) and if that nasty little ball doesn’t stop on red (intended outcome doesn’t happen) then there it is; MISERY! Ding Ding Dine, we have a winner!

When did we (yes, you’re officially in this mess  now too) decide that we have no control over our own happiness?
When did it become easier to hand over the keys to our “Happiness Castle” to someone or something else rather than just choosing to be happy?
Maybe (and I’m just thinking out loud here, so bear with me) we do that because blaming some external force for our discontent or UN-happiness might just be a little easier than taking responsibility for our own feelings and ultimately, for our own life. (Yes!!)
Is it possible that we become victims of circumstance who can comfortably and habitually point fingers so that we can avoid looking in the mirror? (gasp)

Are we programmed as children to believe that we have to wait for the happy ending versus living it from the beginning? No good grade, no happiness.  No coloring in the lines, no happiness.  No date to the dance, no happiness.  No hanging with the “cool kids,” no happiness.  No place on the team, no happiness... I'm unhappy just thinking about all of this.

Can’t we just live happy lives because it feels so much better than sadness or disappointment? 

After all this pre-coffee mind wandering today, I’m realizing that it really does require more energy to rely on someone else or some external outcome to deliver happiness versus just BEING happy. 

What would happen if we decided to RE-member that happiness is a place we can start FROM versus being a destination we have to get TO? (insert choir of angels singing and dramatic thunder and lightning here)

Oh, and by the way nay-sayers, yes of course I realize it sounds simplistic, but I gotta tell you, I crave simplistic happiness in my life.  I seek out simplistic happiness.  I NEED simplistic happiness.  I’ve endured enough drama, sadness and disappointment this year (and its only August) to last me a lifetime.  So when I woke up to that voice and realized this morning that most of that sadness is due to my expectations not being met, I decided that I’m done with it.  I’m done living inside of a life that tethers happiness to outcome.  I’m done waiting for happiness that is always and forever based on something else happening.  To hell with that crap.  I like the idea of being happy RIGHT NOW!  Bring on the happy!

So my beautiful friends, now we (yes, still talking to you) have a choice, and believe me when I tell you that it very much IS a choice….  We can be happy right now or not….but make no mistake, it is completely up to you….the decision is fundamentally and unconditionally yours; every moment of every day.  Your choice.  
Of course I could help out and hand you a laundry list of reasons NOT to be happy because that would be so easy and heck yes, misery absolutely loves company.  But really, aren’t you sick and tired of waiting for happiness versus just BEING happy?  I am.

Isn’t the choice sort of simple?  I think so.  We'll take the leap and jump in together! 
Screw the expectations! 
Let's just choose happiness and never look back….no matter what!

Wishing you bliss and blessings!
Heather

It's Tuesday....Let's Talk Tarot.

 Holy cow....I don’t think I have ever been this self-conscious as far as sharing a piece of something SO important to me.  But if I have learned anything at all in recent months, it is that life is short and we really must do what makes us authentically happy.  If we never step into who we absolutely know we are meant to be, then honestly, what is the point? 

That being said, it is after many deep breaths, far too long steeped in contemplation and a lot of reassurance from my husband that I would like to introduce you to the new addition that I will be offering at Ruby Slippers; Tarot Cards (pause for reaction). 

Before you jump to judgment or click “unfollow,” or “unfriend” might I ask you to just indulge me and read on a bit...it's so important to me that you understand what this is all about, and what Tarot is truly about versus what you might have been lead to believe….  In my heart, regardless of what others have tried to use them for, Tarot is not, nor has it ever been about fortune telling, divination or sitting across from you with a crystal ball and offering wisdom about what is going to happen in your life next month.  The insight and clarity that Tarot and a good reading can offer is actually far more valuable than that! 

I’ve been in love with, fascinated by and connected to Tarot Cards for as long as I can remember….and I mean that quite literally.  I think I was 6 or so when I got to hold my father’s deck for the first time and “play” with them.  The size of the cards being so big in my tiny little hands, the beautiful illustrations…I was smitten from day one.

I fell so in love and got so comfortable with them that in 6^th grade (after winning an argument with my mom and dad about sharing the cards publicly) as a class project I did a visual presentation on the Tarot right down to a sample reading for my 6^th grade teacher…. Obviously, the reading (back then I thought of the cards and their layout as more of a fun game with no ending) was a simple one done from a 6^th grade point of view, honesty and maturity level.  However, I was always a wildly insightful child and unknowingly must have struck some sort of a nerve because the teacher (who, by the way, initially liked the idea of Tarot cards) gave me a terrible grade and I got in big trouble for bringing “witchcraft” to school.  My parents were called in to explain and defend this “black magic madness,” and we were all reprimanded.  It was a very confusing experience because they basically threw the book (cards) at me!   That’s the first time it ever occurred to me that the cards could be interpreted or used as anything other than pretty pictures that helped to tell a very imaginative (I now know this to be replaced with the word “intuitive”) story.

Tarot and I have had a solid and loyal relationship for close to forty years and in that time, I have done numerous and acutely accurate intuitive readings for friends and loved ones alike.  For me, the cards have never been about magic or witchcraft or any sort of a dark practice.  Instead, they are more like a wonderful way to blur the lines between our conscious and subconscious minds and help to get us in touch with our PRESENT selves versus trying to predict the future.  If used correctly, they can help to peel back a few of the social masks many of us have gotten far too comfortable wearing and invite us to reveal our true nature as far as what is really happening in that big, beautiful heart of ours. 

My goal with Tarot is to bring clarity and understanding while helping to shine a light on areas of our lives that might need a little more attention or truth.  I love to use Tarot as a tool for opening up a dialogue and getting my client to really step into his/her own current story rather than being a spectator who is merely watching their life happen or choosing to be a victim of it. 

Tarot is about honesty and insight and perhaps a fresh set of eyes helping to reveal things happening within and around you that can offer powerful lessons and opportunity for life-changing growth.   Tarot has the ability to be one of our most valuable resources for personal development if we are willing to really listen and learn from the messages and insight they reveal. 

I like to think of Tarot as that one really good friend you can count on to always be honest with you even if he/she knows you might not love or want to agree with what you are going to hear.  Her intention is never to hurt you, quite the contrary, she wants what is best for you, so the only way to get to that place is by offering you the gentle truth.  

As with anything else, the reading and intuitive accuracy are only as good as the person holding the cards and after almost 40 years, I like to think that I know what I’m doing!  A true Tarot reading is not about an instruction manual and a booklet offering card meanings.  It is instead about inviting our own intuition and divine nature to be our guide and teacher.

I understand that for many, Tarot is sometimes seen as offensive and lumped into a category with Witchcraft and dark magic.  (just ask me about the first time I showed my husband my deck of Tarot and explained what he was looking at) The truth is, we can look at just about any religious or spiritually based group or teaching and find a way to make it into something shadowy and negative when used the wrong way or for the wrong reasons.  My intent has always been to rely on Tarot as a bridge and a pathway back to our most authentic selves.  I like to think of myself as both a facilitator of understanding and change as well as a cultivator of awareness. 

During the course of a reading, I won’t be able to provide you with the winning lottery numbers, but I can and will help guide you backwards up to the present in order to recognize your truth.  By working together, I can then show you how to lean forward into your life so that you will see how a few changes or adjustments might take you on a fabulous new journey towards creating and embracing the very best version of your authentic self.  It’s truly a remarkable and often life-altering experience if you invite it to be.

One of the questions I am often asked is, where do religion and God figure into all of this?  Now I know that what I am about to say might offend a few of you, so I apologize in advance, but I do hope that you will respect the manner with which it is intended; my personal opinion…nothing more and nothing less.  My truest belief has always been that we are each, every single one of us, created in the likeness and image of God.  In my heart, God, Source, Spirit or whatever you choose to call it, has never been something that is OUT there…. Instead, I very much believe that we each are born with a beautiful Divine spark glowing deep inside of ourselves that acts almost as a powerful light connecting us to the Source of all things; God and yes, even one another. 

I believe that we are each Divine beings on a very individual, very personal human journey.   I also believe that Tarot has the ability to serve as a wonderful vehicle to re-introduce us to our own Divine spark while bridging the gap between our conscious and unconscious minds.  The Tarot puts an end to the great divide between the Divine and ourselves by showing us that we each carry the spark of God within.  The moment we were spoken into creation, we were born of and in the essence of God.

Amidst the chaos of real life, some of us, myself included, have a harder time remembering the Divine fabric we are woven from and are a part of.  My job, my responsibility as someone who has a deep understanding of Tarot and the insight they offer, is to help you re-member who you are and to shine a big sparkling light on the unlimited happiness and blessings that are already at work and available within your own life.   The truth is, you are created as Divine possibility, my job via my work with Tarot is merely to help you step firmly into that truth and assist as you weave its potential into your everyday existence.

If you have any questions or would like to set up a private consultation, please contact me via phone, private message or email!   Your privacy is of the utmost important to me and I treat every inquiry and reading as a sacred experience to be shared only between you and I!  Please know that your information will never be shared, sold, or otherwise. 

I look forward to working with you soon!
Wishing you an abundance of bliss and blessings,

Heather

Curiously Curated Art-Full Kits!

It's taken me a lot of years but I admit it....most of the time the completed piece of art work is not nearly as exciting as the creative process itself!  Scouting and digging and collecting all sorts of little treasures is like a scavenger hunt for things I never knew I "needed" but suddenly cannot live without!  Over the years, I have collected more than I could ever use and I am happy to finally be at a place where I want to share all my treasures with you!  I think I might be really saddened by all the mass produced new-that-is-made-to-look-old "stuff" out there and so my answer to all the STUFF filling the big box shelves is to pull out all the stops, dive into my collection and share the vintage magic!
I'm finally giving myself creative license to curate more and more wonderful mixed media art kits packed full of possibility as far as the imagination can see!
Part of what I love the most when it comes to being  a SERIOUSLY creative girl is being able to see art-full potential in the most wonderful places and things!
I love coming across something that someone else thought was trash and challenging myself to use it for something completely different than it was intended for...

Recently I found myself digging through my back room at Ruby trying to go through some amazing fabric books I had and pull together some textile kits for you.  As is typically the case, my eyes began to wander (if you've ever peeked into my back room at Ruby, you understand) over the piles of papers and various things stacked on top of each other waiting to be loved.  Peeking out from the pile were about 20 enormous vintage calendars that I had purchased with the intention of using their art work for something new and fabulous (famous last words).  To be honest, I loved the front covers so much, I had never really looked through them...until now.
Before I even knew what was happening I had unconsciously dropped my fabric books, pushed them to the side and pulled out the pile of unopened calendars!  As I flipped through their beautiful pages I fell more and more in love with each illustration.
From flora, to fauna, birds to butterflies, vegetables and more, each vintage illustration was its own story and I was in love! These were just too good to cram into a pile...they need to be shared right now!
As I took each calendar apart and began to scan their pages in the hope of creating various sizes, it occurred to me that these images would make the most wonderful greeting card collections!  So, I went around the studio and collected some blank greeting cards, various coordinating papers, vintage fabric, lace and trims, sparkles, baubles, jewelry bits and anything else I could see somehow making their way onto a lovely greeting card.  Before I knew what was happening, my COMING SOON Greeting Card Kits were born!!

Each kits contains 5 blank greeting cards, a wonderful stack of mini vintage illustrations like the ones seen above, fancy pants papers, vintage lace, trims, some sparkle and a few other surprises!  Every kit contains more than enough options to create 5 truly unique greeting cards for whatever occasion strikes your fancy!
For as long as I have been creating, I have always known that for me, the best part of the process is the hunt for all the magical little bits and baubles that become part of the story!  I hope that each of these Limited Edition One-of-a-kind kits bring you lots of joy and inspiration!
Kits will be available early next week!  Stay tuned!
Until then, I wish you an abundance of bliss and blessings!
Heather

My First Full Moon Release Ritual!!!

I'm so excited about this full moon that I actually feel like a little kid on Christmas morning!
Truth be told, in the midst of everything else that has been swirling around in my life, there has been a constant and almost rhythmic tugging at my heart that has been pulling me in a new direction the last several months and I wasn't really sure where it was coming from or what I was supposed to do with it until recently. 
What started out as a response to some big changes in my life wound up leading me right into what I now understand is the voice of my most authentic self finally speaking louder than all the crap I usually hear in my head!  This is the positive, happy and encouraging voice underneath the "other" voice that I've become accustomed to thinking had my best interest in mind!  Wrong.
This new voice is the one I get to listen to when I make an effort to stick my ego in a soundproof box and only listen to my heart!  
I don't quite have a name or title for what this pull actually is, the only thing I know for sure is that it feels very 'right,' and so I have decided to get out of my own way and see where the road takes me....  Words like "intuition, spirituality, balance, creativity, facilitator, guide and art" all seem to be marinating together in my brain and what they will eventually turn into, well, that remains to be seen!
Tonight, all roads lead to me creating and executing my very first (and hopefully many more) Full Moon Release Ritual and I am so excited to share it with you... This big beautiful full moon slowly and steadily rising outside of my window is the cue I have been waiting for to pivot towards this fresh direction I want my life to go towards.  I thoroughly loved performing this ritual tonight and I hope that when you are ready, it feels right for you too!  Feel free to change or tweak anything you need to in order to make it more of your own too! 
So, without further delay, here I go...

The Magic and the Moon!

For those who are not familiar with why tonight has the potential to be such a powerful energetic opportunity, the full moon is actually the perfect time to:

-make the choice to put an end to the patterns, people and ideals that no longer serve us...

-decide that it is time to release old ways of thinking, limiting beliefs, grudges, and fears and self- imposed limits

-set your intention to say good-bye to a situation, thought process or emotion that no longer aligns with your version of yourself

In other words, LET THAT SHIT GO!!!  

For my very first Full Moon Release Ritual I came up with a few simple "tools" that I feel contribute to the overall intention as well as a nod to my need for visual aids! You can also add your own items like perhaps a piece of Moonstone, a special scented candle or whatever feels right for you!

I suggest having the following items available:
One bowl full of water, flower petals and/or flowers, and maybe a few drops of your favorite essential oils
The other bowl should be fireproof and empty.  It can be a terra cotta pot, ceramic, or even a fire pit if you're more comfortable that way!  Just make sure it's fireproof and empty!
A candle
Matches
Paper
Pen

Take a moment and find a well ventilated space for your ritual. It doesn't have to be anything fancy, it can be a permanent area of your home or yard or even a little pop-up space you create for yourself!  The space doesn't matter as much as your intent, so don't make yourself crazy!  I chose to set up a little pop-up space in our backyard because the weather was great, I always had the moon in my line of sight and it felt like the right place to do this!
Once you've located your space, set up your items, light your candle and pause for a moment!!  Take a few deep breaths and give yourself a minute to get quiet and move your heart into a space of pure clarity and intention!!  These next few minutes are about YOU and nobody else....just YOU doing something positive for YOURSELF!  Take a second and savor it!

Now, whenever you're ready you can go ahead and on that piece of paper you've got, take some time to write down whatever it is you want to release!  There are no rules for this, only list what you are comfortable with and remember that this isn't a competition or a test!  Maybe you'll have one thing you want to be free of or finished with, and maybe, if you're anything like me tonight, you'll have a list of thoughts, emotions, worn out beliefs and self imposed limiting fears you are ready to say good-bye to.  There is no right or wrong number of items!  Just write down what you feel ready to set  free!!  

Once you have your list complete, sign it, date it and thank each item on that list for the lesson it brought you.  (yes, those old beliefs taught us something even if the only lesson is that we're done with them and now we know what we don't want in our lives anymore)

Using the candle you lit, go ahead and gently dip a corner of your list paper into the flame and let it catch fire (carefully).  As you place your paper into the fireproof bowl and it becomes engulfed in the flame, watch as the smoke drifts out into the Universe taking all of your old fears, beliefs, patterns and anything else you decided to release with it!  

If your page took a while to light or is burning slowly, you might ask yourself if you are truly ready to let go of the thing(s) you wrote down.  

The faster your paper burns, the more willing you were to say good-bye to the things you wanted to release. 

As the page continues to burn you can focus on your breathing, hold your intentions gently in your heart space, say good-bye and know that it is okay to set them free!  As your page and anything you decided to release drift off into the abyss, it is okay to embrace whatever emotions you feel bubbling up to the surface.  Allow yourself to be grateful for whatever is there, take a breath and then let it move up and out of you!  If it helps, you can even intentionally exhale it into the wind!

At this point, trust that you are moving to a new heart space!  Take a moment to dip your hands into the beautiful bowl of flowers and water you set out and see yourself as being free of everything you just released!  The water is meant as a symbol of purity and for the clearing/cleansing of old thoughts. The flowers are to remind you to notice and appreciate the abundance of beauty and blessings that are within and around you every day!  Be still for a moment and don't forget to say "thank you!"  

Congratulations to you for having the courage to say good-bye to all that junk you've been dragging around.  You've now made room for all sorts of wonderful and positive new thoughts, opportunities and beliefs that couldn't quite get to you with all that old shit blocking their path!!!

By the way, it's important to know that if the idea of an actual "ritual" isn't your thing or doesn't quite feel right, that's okay!!  You can still set a mental intention to release something or even write about it in your journal if you like!  Whatever feels right, that's what you honor!  

I've wanted to do something like this for a long time, so it felt right to make it into something special for myself, but that's me!  

I hope that this gives you some ideas and inspiration for doing your own "Moon Work." I loved it so much, I'm actually thinking of hosting a New Moon Intention Celebration as well as a Full Moon Release Ritual at my home studio next month!  I find that when doing work like this it can be a truly wonderful and rewarding experience when we can share it with someone else!

Thank you so much for being here!

Don't forget to leave any sort of comments or thoughts below!  I look forward to hearing from you!

Wishing you an abundance of bliss and blessings!
Heather