From Ordinary to Extra-Ordinary!

How many times have you opened a junk drawer and found an old deck of playing cards living there?  You probably kept rooting around, moving everything about to find what you were looking for and never gave those lonely cards a second thought.  Let's face it, unless there's a game of Texas Hold Em getting ready to happen, we don't really pay much homage to the sad little cards.... But maybe we should....because what if, like a caterpillar to a butterfly, they could become something magical?

I opened up my new art studio; Ruby Slippers (click here to read all about it:  http://www.rubyslippersarts.com/welcome.html ) with the idea that I would do my very best to share my love of taking the oh-so-ordinary and transforming it into what Mixed Media art looks like for me.  From old drawer fronts to playing cards, imagine what we could keep out of landfill if we would only learn to see things new ways.

 I generally try to create an environment for myself and my customers that inspires them to look outside of our own self-induced boxes so creating a tiny little journal using nothing but some old playing cards and a lot of ephemera seemed like the perfect way to kick off one of my brand new
Creativity Crafternoons.   I hope you enjoy it!
(click here for more info:  http://www.rubyslippersarts.com/crafternoonsaturdays.html

For this particular playing card, I started with an old book and the hunt for some words that would define what I wanted my card to be about.... In my world, the words are always the jumping off point... and since I knew that I wanted to put my word of the year, Meraki on the flip side of the card, I came up with a few words I felt would honor the definition.... Cut them out and put them aside for later.

 Next I covered the card with some masking tape (totally forgot to take a photo, sorry) to give it a little body and tooth....  Then the layering process can begin!  I tore up some of the cardboard from a box I had laying around in order to give the card a little density and with good old fashioned white craft glue, I simply began to layer different fibers, old lace from a vintage veil and more....

 A fabulous old button gifted from a friend, a few rhinestones and we're getting closer!  A few strands of some shredded hand-dyed muslin and I think we're good to go...Don't forget to punch a hold in the top so you can add a binder ring too!

Once I get to a place where I feel like there is enough of a vibe coming through, then it's time to add the words.  A bit of glue and a couple layers of Modge Podge seal it all up and like magic, a tiny little work of art is born!

Normally I would just add some layers of masking tape and a coat or two of gesso to the back in order to give myself a place to jot down a sentence or two, but since I am creating this deck as a 52 week mini journal, I wanted to give it a theme.  My word of the year is Meraki (scroll down a bit through the other posts to read all about it) so, since it's just the first week of the year, I decided to make this the "cover page" of my new journal by adding the definition to the back of the card! 

A fun project and a really creative and affordable way to get some use out of those lonely little playing cards we've all got laying around!

I hope you enjoyed my very first Creativity Crafternoon post!!
Please feel free to post and share your comments below!!
Wishing you bliss and blessings!
Heather

That Which You Resist Persists....

A million years ago, also known as somewhere around the year 1999-2000 I created what would eventually be known as a mineral makeup cosmetic company.  I didn't know it was actually called "mineral makeup," I didn't know if it would be well received, I only knew that I was madly in love with these tiny pots of colored powder I had stumbled upon at a trade show and my life would literally never be the same. 

 

To make a long story temporarily short, I had always worked in the cosmetic and fashion industries so when I had heard enough people complaining about the crap cosmetics they were forced to use, I knew that these magic little powders somehow held the key to making a positive difference. I just didn't realize at the time how truly profound it would be.

I was, at the time, dating a very fabulous guy (who I would later marry) who recognized and appreciated raw enthusiasm when he saw it and so, encouraged me to look into those little powders and what potential they might have.  So I started doing a crazy amount of research about cosmetics beyond what I knew about applying and wearing them.  I learned everything I could about the ingredients and magic little powders (aka, pigments) all the way down to how cosmetics were formulated and developed in labs.  I was hooked.  It wouldn't be long before I had managed to create a sweet little cosmetic company of my own.

Fast forward a few years later and the tiny little company that I created in one room of our house was now living in a 3000 square foot manufacturing facility where I had reps selling my products, a mirror version of my website in Singapore, employees helping to pack and ship my products to over 75 countries around the globe and I was in heaven...   Sometimes I would go to my building so that I could be alone, turn up the music and get lost in the process of creating new collections of colors faster than my clients could collect them.  I was also selling custom blended products in my store front and spinning like a whirling dervish as my company grew and grew.  And then one day after over 10 years in my biz, my makeup stained brain felt like it was going to explode and I decided that I just couldn't do it anymore. 

Beyond the exhaustion, I had convinced myself that any minute the other shoe was going to drop and the whole thing would be like a big mirage that eventually would come crashing down.  I let my fear of failure and the shame I was certain would go along with it get the best of me and I started to doubt myself constantly. 

The irony of this whole idea of failure is that I never got into the cosmetic world because I thought I would get rich... Nope, quite the contrary; money was actually the furthest thing from my mind.  I got into Mineral Makeup because I was in love with the artistry and potential of makeup.  I knew early on that my perfectionist, competitive nature meant that I would have no choice but to create the best possible product I could offer and it would always have to be a high quality product without compromising the integrity of the ingredients or raking women over the coals financially.  I knew that my love and innate understanding of the industry meant that I could give my clients a great education as far as product, trend and application goes. I also knew then as I know now that I have some kind of magical, crazy gift for understanding color and formulations which translated to no shortage of imagination for generating some truly exciting and innovative eye shadow colors and products. 

I was doing what I loved and yet, somehow felt like I just wasn't worthy of it...I really just needed to take a breath...or maybe a vacation, but hindsight is always 20/20 and I didn't actually figure that out until recently.  Darn it.

When I decided to close up shop, emails showed up from all parts of the globe from people wanting to buy my recipes and hire me as a consultant to help them create a company like mine.  I sold almost everything to do with the business and thought I was finished forever..at least that's what I tried to tell myself... 

Then the little tugs started happening.... I would literally feel a physical need to create a new color every once in a while....I had to whip up a custom foundation or blush and get my "fix."  I looked for reasons to talk about Mineral Makeup...but I also kept telling myself that it would pass.

I closed up shop and sold off everything roughly 4 years ago.  I've spent almost every day since wishing that I hadn't been so stubborn, proud and afraid.  Up until recently pride prevented me from telling my husband or the people who knew me best just how much I missed it. Gary and I would re-visit it or reminisce from time to time and I would come close to telling him that I wanted to go back, and then would talk myself out of it.  Thankfully, I have the sort of husband that knew when to not push...

So I did other things that creative entrepreneurs like myself, do...I created new businesses and kept my mind and my hands busy.  As long as I was doing something with my creativity I could pretend that those beautiful little powdered pigments weren't constantly calling my name.   I could pretend that the women I was meeting wouldn't have fun creating their own eye colors or letting me create a custom blended foundation for them...or offer a cosmetic refresher tutorial....

And so the years passed and the lies I told myself seemed to quiet down a bit unless I passed a makeup counter or needed to go into Ulta for something...then it was almost too much to bear but I kept looking forward and stayed comfortable in my cozy little sea of denial...for a while...

A little over three weeks ago I opened up something else that is exceedingly close to my heart....my wonderful new Art Studio and creative space called The Ruby Slippers....  It is a fabulous little spot in Union Pier, Michigan where people come to be a part of my other love....mixed media art and creativity!  I have a little artisan boutique with products created by myself and local artists, I offer workshops, classes and a magical place where people with no creative experience whatsoever can be comfortable and happy creating and learning to their hearts' content.  It is bliss and I am off to a fabulous start....but then one day almost out of the blue, the little tug starts again...

The tempting little muse who knows far more than she should would whisper that the beautiful light filled space right in the front window would be perfect for a little cosmetic nook... "Shhh...stop it Heather....you're past all that, it was a former life" I would tell myself.  Yet every day that I resisted the tug, the muse spoke louder until one day I somehow found myself online checking to see if my old cosmetic contacts were still around... Could I still get the bulk ingredients I needed to start from scratch?  What about jars?  Brushes?  I wondered what my former company would have been like today if Social Media had existed back then... I even started seeing new colors in my head... 

I was like a drug addict back on the streets looking for my next fix and man, I was in deep.

Then, I woke up one morning and the way all good things happen, by the Grace of God it dawned on me that this is what people mean when they talk about their true passion.  I had been searching for it as long as I could remember and it had literally been there sitting on my shoulder all along.  Now that I understood what it was I had been feeling, how could I ever knowingly choose to silence it again? I decided right then and there that I wouldn't.

I know that it's different for everybody but if you've experienced it even once, then you know what I mean.... It's that thing that you keep trying to silence or run from but it keeps finding you....that thing that gets your blood pumping fast and the fabulous dreaming and anticipation of WHAT IF is almost too much... It's what makes you smile to yourself when you think about how it feels to be doing that thing you love so very much. 

For me...the process of developing new products and colors was like that almost inexplicable feeling you have the first time you realize you're in love with the person you eventually wind up marrying.... In my world, not only did I marry the great guy, but I also got to experience that sort of butterfly high with every new collection and product launch I created. 

I was starting to really question my sanity for having intentionally chosen to give it up.

The good news is that I finally came clean with my husband....told him how much I had been missing my cosmetic company....told him exactly how much love I still had for those magical little jars of powder.  Suffice it to say, he wasn't surprised and in fact, wanted to understand why I hadn't just told him sooner. 

Duh Heather....it seems that the only one who didn't acknowledge how much you loved everything about your cosmetic company was you.

Today  I am proud...elated...excited...nervous and SO FREAKING HAPPY to tell you that I placed an order for the backbone of the bulk ingredients I need to get back to the art of creating Mineral Makeup again.  I'm not diving in the way I would like to, but instead am going to slowly wade back into the pool so that this time I can savor every moment of my cosmetic adventure. 

To be able to have a creative arts space where both of my true loves can live side by side is almost more than bliss than I can even think about and I intend to marinate in the deliciousness of it all for as long as I possibly can.

It's taken a lot of time to understand what passion really feels like.  I'm having to learn one step at a time that it's okay to enjoy it...to be happy....to stop resisting what I know makes my heart SING....

I am blessed and can't wait to share all this magic and possibility with clients, friends and anybody else who happens to cross my path....

The moral of this very long story is simple and so profoundly important...

Honor your passion...the one that you keep trying to silence or run from, or even worse, deny it's very existence.  I have news for you, no matter how creatively you to try to out run it, it's going to be like the scary guy in every horror movie and will always and forever be just a pace or two behind you.

Honor your passion enthusiastically, honestly and intentionally with your whole heart because until you do, I promise you that it will be like the nagging little itch in the middle of your back that you can't quite reach to scratch and it's not going to go away...ever.

Wishing you the courage to do what you already know will make so very happy!

Honor your passion.

Sending you love and blessings,

Heather

Meraki for Everybody!! Oopah!

 

Happy and healthy New Year!!

So, I'm not sure who started the whole "Word of the Year" phenomenon but I have to say, every year as we inch closer to the new year, it sure does make me think.

I'm not terribly fond of committing to one word that I believe can accurately represent an entire year, especially when I don't have a crystal ball to tell me what that year is going to look like.

But I can certainly live with the intention...the idea that if I plant a word or idea firmly in my heart, then perhaps it will shape what comes next...almost like a self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

My word for 2017 is MERAKI

I don't speak even a syllable of Greek, so I'm not even sure where I would have heard this beautiful word but one look at its definition and I knew it was exactly what I needed.

 

Meraki;

to do something with soul, creativity or love;

leaving a piece of yourself in what you are doing. 

Do it with Passion

Do it with Meraki

 

And after all, if it isn't done with Meraki, then really, what's the point of doing it at all, right?

So, my commitment to myself this year is do try and approach everything with love, with passion and with soul.  No more doing things just because it is expected of me, or because I am worried about what someone else will think.  No thank you. 

I'm bringing soul to the table and giving it a permanent seat!

 

I don't want to live an unconscious life....I want to live it with enthusiasm and passion and in celebration and excited anticipation of what it coming next.  Even on the cloudy days when it feels like all I want to do is stay in bed, if I can dig deep and find a way to live from a place of Meraki then imagine what a wonderful adventure every moment could be.

I have a good feeling about this year. 

I have launched a new art studio, I am getting ready to bring back a cosmetic line I had created and manufactured for over ten years and I really feel as though I am finally on the right path.

Bring on the good stuff 2017.  I am so ready!

 

Wishing you bliss and blessings!

Heather

 

 

 

Let That Shit Go.

So, after almost two years away from my blog, I’m back. 

 I kept visiting and thinking that maybe I was just done with the whole blog idea….maybe I had outgrown it, but I’ve had some experiences in the last several months that made me realize it was time to start writing again.

So, here’s my first big post of the New Year…

Today  I want to tell you briefly about my life-long relationship with SHAME.  We’re actually in the process of breaking up, but as I’m sure you know, some habits die hard, so while I’m working out the emotional custody issues etc. I thought I might share this with you….

If you are plagued by SHAME like I have been, it’s time to decide to LET THAT SHIT GO.

I’ve spent a lot of my life surrounded by family members who love to tell me all the ways they perceive that I have fallen short in my life or compare me to other family members that they believe have fallen short.   I let them lead me to think that I was damaged….broken and wildly flawed.   It was actually pretty easy to let them convince me that because I wasn’t like them….because I wouldn’t shrink down and smash myself into their boxes, then somehow I must have something really wrong with me.

I spent YEARS and YEARS going to therapists, self-analyzing, over-thinking and trying to fix so many things I was lead to believe were broken about me.  I have dragged shame around like a suitcase full of heavy, wet sand....and I was so tired from all the extra weight. (Figuratively and literally)

Turns out, the path towards healing can sometimes come from the strangest places and an angry email a few months ago from a member of my family was all it would take to cause me to do a little course-correcting and ultimately set me on new journey toward finally being free of my self-sabotaging ways.

 I received the email out of the blue and after getting past the initial shock, I stopped crying and read it until I couldn’t see straight.  I read it to my husband….and re-read it again and again until I almost had it memorized.  I kept reading because I was actually looking beyond the anger of their words for an answer.

Part of the shame I had carried with me over the years was in part because of how this person had treated me and suddenly after reading this email everything was different.   I was faced with the knowledge that there might not be one shred of truth to anything he had wanted me to believe about myself.  He condemned me because of things that he believed to be true and his mind had turned those beliefs into facts. 

 All those years I had truly thought I had done something horrible that I wasn’t aware of….some big terrible thing that I needed to apologize for, but it turns out, there wasn’t any ONE big thing.  In this person’s mind, there were a lot of little things over the years that they had chosen to hold on to....layered into the fact that he just doesn’t like me.  How do I argue or defend myself against someone; even if they're family, who has already made up their mind about me?   I don’t.

I had carried shame for so long…I had adopted SHAME as a crutch I would use for shrinking who I am, for limiting what I believed was possible for myself and for never quite becoming the woman I had really wanted to be.  Honestly, I think it got to a point where I became almost so used to settling and stopping myself before I ever really got out of the gate that I had forgotten what was even possible.

Suddenly, because of this email, I was beginning to understand for the first time in my life that my shame and what I believed about myself was based on a perception and had nothing to do with the truth of who I am.   Of course there are things about me I hope to improve on and I will never quit working to evolve into the very best version of me that I can be.  But I will do it based on what I know to be true about myself, not what I am told is a truth.  This person had told themselves and me an entire story; a myth about who I am that literally has absolutely nothing to do with me. 

This sort of clarity is one of those larger than life truths that has the power to alter everything.  Once you fundamentally grasp the knowledge with your heart, there is no way to un-know it and you can’t help but be changed forever. 

Shame is not real.  It is a story we tell ourselves based on what other people have told us because of what they told themselves….based on what they have been told, what they have experienced….and so on and so on.  Can you see how this is a big, addicting, cyclical mess?  Read it again.  Holy shit.  Think about the domino effect this has had on all of us...

We accept shame as truth and then spread it around like the common cold never thinking that maybe we should instead, be trying to set ourselves free by killing the germs that cause it.  Perception, history and experience have nothing to do with us and yet, they hold the power to affect us in ways we are not conscious of…until one fateful day and one lousy email rips the veil forever.  Then we must decide that it’s time to be done with shame once and for all because to accept anything less would just be ridiculous.

Like I said earlier, I’m doing my best to end my relationship with shame, but old habits really do die hard, so in the meantime, I just wanted you to know that you can choose to break up with shame too.

Many will try to tell you that YOU are the problem….some may unknowingly try to keep shame present in your life because they don’t know any better, but we don't have to accept it.  What once seemed like it was a permanent part of life now has an expiration date on it.  Make no mistake, it’s a choice….and it’s not an easy addiction to overcome, but with the right mirror and a new mantra, we are going to be just fine.

Like the saying goes, “what you think of me is really none of my business.”

Wishing you bliss and abundance,

Heather